November 18, 1918
DEAR SISTER,
I appreciated your little note. I observe that you have survived the
operation. I hope that it will be entirely successful, so that India
may for many a year to come continue to hear your songs. For me I
do not know when I shall be able to leave this sickbed of mine. Somehow
or other, I cannot put on flesh and gain more strength than I have.
I am making a mighty attack. The doctors of course despair in face
of the self-imposed restrictions under which I am labouring. I assure
you that they have been my greatest consolation during this protracted
illness. I have no desire whatsoever to live upon condition of breaking
those disciplinary and invigorating restrictions. For me, although
they restrict the body somewhat, they free the soul and they give
me a consciousness of it which I should not otherwise possess. "You
can't serve God and Mammon" has a clearer and deeper meaning
for me after those vows. I do not infer that they are necessary for
all, but they are for me. If I broke them I feel that I should be
perfectly worthless.
Do let me have an occasional line from you.
Yours,
M. K. Gandhi
Collected Works of Mahatma Gandhi, Vol. XV, pp. 64-65